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Just a personal journey part 2 - Darker days
kalooki8
Member Posts: 451
in Poker Chat
This took me a while to decide whether to post, however if someone has gambling issues, can relate to some of my experiences and wants to talk about it or direct message me, I would be happy to listen and / or discuss.
In my early 20s I was gambling on anything and everything. Horse racing, football, card schools with mates including 3 card brag, chase the ace and shoot. Gambling was in control at this time but was the catalyst to darker times ahead. I should have seen the signs, I won a massive $48, (laptop doesn’t do a pound sign) from my last 82p (75p lucky 15, plus 7p tax), when I told my ex-wife, she insisted we buy a new vacuum cleaner, whereas I wanted to drink and gamble it. There are many other times that I look back on and think what an idiot you were. I suppose I’m not the only one.
Wife number 2 was the beginning of when gambling got out of hand. Fruit machines in the bookies and pubs was my new addiction. At home I was instigating arguments, pushing the right buttons to make her go off like a bottle of pop, and me the sudden wounded party storming out of the house to the sanctuary of the bookies. I know I’m not painting myself in a good light here, but we all know there is a fantastic side to gambling and a dirty side when it gets out of control. Worse was to come before it gets better.
Wife number 3. This was when problems really hit. I was paying an extraordinary amount of maintenance on 3 children to 2 ex-wives, leaving me with hardly anything to live on after paying my share of the bills. I was still in the bookies on my lunch hour, and now the new thing was roulette machines. I’d watch people win and I thought if I could do that with their ‘system’ I could gamble myself out of debt (yeah, I know). After one bad session, I lost all my money and bills were not yet paid. This cost me 5 years of further debt as I managed to get a loan. 5 years of hiding un-opened bank statements and avoiding phone calls.
Then I deposited $100 into an on-line poker site, and I was found out by wife 3. Off to gamblers anonymous in Chester I was sent. I went twice, thought I don’t belong with these ‘losers’ (Yes I did!) I came up with a plan. I collected all the anti-gambling leaflets I could, hid them in the car and took a fresh one home to wife 3 every week. Every week I would go religiously but not to Chester, I would go left instead of right to a casino in Stoke. How cunning someone with an addiction can be!
It was around the time of the end of my relationship with wife 3 that I got to hear about a ‘Sky’ channel dedicated to poker. This was a game changer for me as I realised that I could gamble on something where I had a modicum of control over an outcome. I do believe that Sky poker saved me from a spiralling addiction. I am now almost totally in control of my gambling and I no longer chase losses. I know this may sound cheesy to relate my story to Sky but I found something that I am reasonable at (within my level of competence). I will continue this in part 3, my experiences of playing internet and live poker. I promise no bad beat stories.
ps I have plenty of time to write these as there is no wife n.o 4. Mother said the other day, 'isn't it time you found yourself a nice lady, you've been happy long enough now'. Thanks Mum but I'm too selfish with my poker, golf, golf in Spain, pool, PNE season ticket etc.
In my early 20s I was gambling on anything and everything. Horse racing, football, card schools with mates including 3 card brag, chase the ace and shoot. Gambling was in control at this time but was the catalyst to darker times ahead. I should have seen the signs, I won a massive $48, (laptop doesn’t do a pound sign) from my last 82p (75p lucky 15, plus 7p tax), when I told my ex-wife, she insisted we buy a new vacuum cleaner, whereas I wanted to drink and gamble it. There are many other times that I look back on and think what an idiot you were. I suppose I’m not the only one.
Wife number 2 was the beginning of when gambling got out of hand. Fruit machines in the bookies and pubs was my new addiction. At home I was instigating arguments, pushing the right buttons to make her go off like a bottle of pop, and me the sudden wounded party storming out of the house to the sanctuary of the bookies. I know I’m not painting myself in a good light here, but we all know there is a fantastic side to gambling and a dirty side when it gets out of control. Worse was to come before it gets better.
Wife number 3. This was when problems really hit. I was paying an extraordinary amount of maintenance on 3 children to 2 ex-wives, leaving me with hardly anything to live on after paying my share of the bills. I was still in the bookies on my lunch hour, and now the new thing was roulette machines. I’d watch people win and I thought if I could do that with their ‘system’ I could gamble myself out of debt (yeah, I know). After one bad session, I lost all my money and bills were not yet paid. This cost me 5 years of further debt as I managed to get a loan. 5 years of hiding un-opened bank statements and avoiding phone calls.
Then I deposited $100 into an on-line poker site, and I was found out by wife 3. Off to gamblers anonymous in Chester I was sent. I went twice, thought I don’t belong with these ‘losers’ (Yes I did!) I came up with a plan. I collected all the anti-gambling leaflets I could, hid them in the car and took a fresh one home to wife 3 every week. Every week I would go religiously but not to Chester, I would go left instead of right to a casino in Stoke. How cunning someone with an addiction can be!
It was around the time of the end of my relationship with wife 3 that I got to hear about a ‘Sky’ channel dedicated to poker. This was a game changer for me as I realised that I could gamble on something where I had a modicum of control over an outcome. I do believe that Sky poker saved me from a spiralling addiction. I am now almost totally in control of my gambling and I no longer chase losses. I know this may sound cheesy to relate my story to Sky but I found something that I am reasonable at (within my level of competence). I will continue this in part 3, my experiences of playing internet and live poker. I promise no bad beat stories.
ps I have plenty of time to write these as there is no wife n.o 4. Mother said the other day, 'isn't it time you found yourself a nice lady, you've been happy long enough now'. Thanks Mum but I'm too selfish with my poker, golf, golf in Spain, pool, PNE season ticket etc.
Comments
That's a tremendous read. You should write a book.
@Glenelg - yes pne, you'd think I'd suffered enough.
@lucy4 - Wow, you may have a better story to tell. I've actually never been married, just 3 long term relationships. It was just easier for the narrative. The rest is true unfortunately.
We used to play 3 card brag in the Labour club Manchester the table limit was 20p or 40p blind, doesnt sound a lot but there used to be some massive kitties.
Loving the honesty in this thread. I'll maybe try & add a little more to it in a day or two, like many of us, I've had/got my own gambling demons, though fortunately they are under control. I think...
I think many of us got the gambling 'bug' in similar ways, for me it was penny arcades when very young and that became a costly (in relative terms) addiction for many years. I remember on more than one occasion as a teenager cycling off to do my Saturday gardening job, working all day for £5 then cycling down to the arcades and losing it all before cycling home very p****d off with myself, only to do similar the next week, it seems I was a slow learner back then!
I have managed to kick the slots addiction almost completely now and poker gives me the gambling thrill with the added bonus that I actually win (sometimes).
Ah found out if you if you held yer penny half way doon the slot it kept all the slots open, then just before the race was finished ah would drop a penny on the winning horse, winner every time.
This one day ah could hardly walk oot the door with ma pockets full of pennies when the owner collared me, lifted me up, emptied ma pockets and threatened to fling me off the harbour, needless to say ah didn't do it again.
@Enut - Thanks for the compliment, I forgot about the penny arcades. My family used to holiday each year in the Isle of Man. In Ramsey town was an arcade, in it was a pin ball machine that paid a packet of trebor mints if you hit the right sequence. Me and my brother were hooked.
@rabdeniro - good story mate, very dishonest of you and yes if I was that clever I'd have done the same. ps I never won on them. They have one in the Bellagio in Vegas.
I was another brought up on playing cards with the folks at a young age... Newmarket, Whist, Cribbage etc. Wasnt until my pub days that a found card games with a money side....3 card brag, crash etc. Friday night at some pubs there was quite a few games on the go (due to Pay day packets in cash) Saw a lot of folks lose their wages and then some back in them days. I was always ' in control' even back then, and always made sure I had enough for the pool table and beers, so never really went busto.
Glad you 'seem' to be in control now. Hope your stories help others, as well as yourself.
Why Preston?.......Crewe or Stoke are much bigger clubs to support
My journey started with the good old slots/poker machines when my uncle owned a pub and I would take a stool to reach the buttons! 7 card stud and 25 were played a lot and I soon gathered an interest in these as people were collecting lots of notes and coins!
Cards were played religiously every Sunday in my Grannys house with the good old fashioned 25/45 and the ultimate - kitty/auction 15 where u bid up the amount in the middle to get an extra 5 cards to try and get 3 tricks(if u had 5 of the wild suit, J, and A this was a guarantee) where u win whatever u have bid.
Poker soon followed when dad taught us how to play 5 card draw by taking all our money, we soon learned! When I started playing online I taught the family how to play Texas Holdem - what a game!
Horses were also a family following and I had £2 win on Miinniehoma at 16/1 and thought I was a millionaire and tried and failed to make the million over the years
Probably encountered you in one of the Stoke Casinos. Stanleys, now Grosvenor, or Genting.
Never really got hooked on the horses but certainly dropped thousands on slots over the years. I still self exclude from casino and slot options on here and Stars.
Just a little sports trading and online poker now. Don't even go to the casino as there's no poker on offer since Covid.
I think the advent of the roulette machines at bookies (before the limits I believe are now in place) has sent many people spiralling. I've seen people lose hundreds in a matter of minutes and some didn't seem bothered while others went wild.
I've self excluded casino side of most sites so I'm not tempted and have left one with a really small monthly maximum so it can't cause me headaches.
Hope you feel everything is under control and things are going well. As for PNE at least you have that penalty shoot out record to bask in for a while.