Just wanted to update briefly and say how gutted I was to hear today that David Bowie had passed away. Lots of other people have written things about him far better than I'll be able to so I'll just stick a couple of my favourite songs here...
Poker been up and down, got battered last session of DYMs, about -£140 but I'm still about +£70 overall at them this month/year and loads of points so I'll take that.
Having a real tough time with MTTs atm, things just not going my way, it'll turn soon I'm sure. I came 2nd in the 22bh tonight for £215 and won my Roller seat so was a +£110, my first winning MTT (apart from a +£2.80 one) for a good while. Hopefully it's the start of some good fortune.
Points are on 4540 which is decent cos I didnt play over the weekend at all.
Been having a mare this month at MTTs so decided to just get my head down and grind. Diary had been a bit moany recently but it's hard to not be when things are going bad for a prolonged period.
I'm not quite out of the hole yet for the month but I've had 3 small winning sessions on the bounce now and am starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Just did a graph now, although the MTT count is out a bit, in fact so is profit and every stat, because roller, mini, 55bh, 22bh, 33bh and 11bh aint finished yet so those losses aren't on there yet. I'm actually about -£150 for the month on MTTs. The big spike at the end of the graph was me getting 2nd in the MBI tonight for £400 fwiw.
I've only been playing MTTs this past week cos been doing a lot of stuff round the house in the daytime, redecorating etc. so points have slowed down. I'll probably do cash in the mornings for this coming week cos of double points, then for the last week, I can take my pick of SnGs or cash. Still comfortable for Prio.
Well this week, including heads, I cashed in mains for the grand total of £0 so I'm gonna say no, it was a terrible promo lol.
That does remind me of something I was gonna post here. I showed some of the lads it on Skype the other day but thought it might be interesting to show here so will post it after this post. In short, for some reason I am a solid winner in every single type of MTT on sky but I'm getting hammered in £33bhs. I'd like to keep blaming variance and it does seem like a decent excuse seen as I'm a winner in every other level of BHs (11, 22, 55) but there's only so long you can keep blaming variance...
Out of interest, how much of an increase do you see in Minis during these times when the main guarantee is doubled? They did seem to be a bit bigger this week, presumably the increased main players meant more people taking a shot at the jackpot.
I find it inexplicable how I'm getting destroyed at the 33bhs, but there it is. That should serve as a lesson to people who don't 'get' variance or understand how brutal variance can be. I'm a pretty huge loser in a game that imo I'm easily a (longterm) winner in.
I assume most of those £33 tournies are daily 8-00pm Main Events? If so 158 games is still a small sample in a tournament that averages well over 300 runners.
It's a horrible ROI, but it can definitely be explained as just a quirk of MTT variance. I once had a similar run in £5.75s with much smaller fields. Sooner or later it should/will even out. Good luck.
So here we are... http://tinypic.com/r/2rqikww/9 I find it inexplicable how I'm getting destroyed at the 33bhs, but there it is. That should serve as a lesson to people who don't 'get' variance or understand how brutal variance can be. I'm a pretty huge loser in a game that imo I'm easily a (longterm) winner in. Posted by Lambert180
Lambo, I hope things turn around for you in the 33s soon but 158 games is not even close to a significant sample.
Tbf, only 4 of the mains per week are £33bh, so say I miss 1 per week. 3 a week for 52 weeks = 156 and I've only been grinding MTTs about 12 months so seems about right.
Ty all above, I did say in the previous post it's vv likely just variance, it's just (as Gary said) a strange quirk of variance for it all to come in 1 particular game... a rather annoying quirk when it just happens to be by far the biggest prizepool/1st place money of the night most nights of the week.
In Response to Re: Lambert180 ----- Lolpro and Onwards ------- : Tbf, only 4 of the mains per week are £33bh, so say I miss 1 per week. 3 a week for 52 weeks = 156 and I've only been grinding MTTs about 12 months so seems about right. Ty all above, I did say in the previous post it's vv likely just variance, it's just (as Gary said) a strange quirk of variance for it all to come in 1 particular game... a rather annoying quirk when it just happens to be by far the biggest prizepool/1st place money of the night most nights of the week. It will turn. Posted by Lambert180
Do you not play the £33bh on a Sunday? That makes it 5 a week. Looking at scope you played 97 last year so your sample sizes are to small to take much from. Only thing I would say is are you adjusting well enough to different playing styles? In a £33bh I think you will get a more wide ranging type of playing styles than you would in a £11bh or a £55bh given more sat qualifiers etc.
Poker is just being relentless atm, not been able to get any solid momentum going for months now, getting pretty tough mentally.
Thursday's session was the straw that broke the camel's back, and it was the first time in aaaages I've thought about just 'j@cking it all in' and getting a job, just felt mentally beaten. I also finished that session and for the first time in ages thought 'god I really wanna smoke'. I avoided the temptation thankfully, and am back to feeling fine on the smoking front... This game is **** hard at times!
I was having a couple of day's off over the weekend anyway because it was Emma's birthday, so that was a good chance to have a break from the game which felt much need and I've since spoke to a few of the lads on Skype, mostly Bates and Perc and had some very solid advice.
I came back feeling alot fresher today (although ultimately I still obv have mental game flaws that need fixing), did decent at cash, was about +£100, but went pretty poorly in the night time at MTTs.
I just gotta try and remember, I had a decent year on Sky last year and I'm sure I had loads of awful patches throughout the year but it ended up alright in the end, so just gotta keep ploughing on with the volume and know that it'll come good in the end.
Feels a bit disjointed this post but just wrote what came to mind, prob doesn't even make sense but I need bed now.
All regged up for tonight's freeroll and the UKPC one on Thursday, nice little bonus to see there's 5 freerolls this month instead of 2.
I won't be posting on the diary throughout this month cos I'm going into 'lockdown', trying my hand at DYMs and putting all my focus into that and volumeeee.
On a little over 1500 points from yesterday, and it only cost me £180, seems a good deal As so often happens, a lot comes down to how you get on in the bigger BIs which for me was the £33s, only 7 of them ran (for me) last night I think, and I think I won 1... so that makes it tough to get out of the hole.
Back again tonight for more DYMs and the Prio FR.
Anyway, that's all from me for a bit. I'll update at the end of the month how everything has gone, graphs and all that lark, and will probably do a little summary of how UKPC went, hopefully with a nice little bink to talk about.
Warning!! - This is going to be a moany post so if you don't fancy reading that, it's best you save yourself the time and stop now.
As hard as it may be to believe, I actually don't like moaning but when you commit to doing a diary, then it's best (imo) to be honest, and post about how you genuinely feel. There's no point BS'ing and pretending to be positive 100% of the time when most people aren't in reality or just hiding away and being the 'only post when you're winning' type so sometimes the diary takes a very moany turn cos that's how you feel.
It's how I've been feeling for months now. I aint busto'd my roll (yet!) before anyone asks but I've deffo busto'd any shred of confidence I had left in my game. Just been consistently losing and/or breaking even for 6 months straight now. Roll has taken a bit of a knock ofc because while I haven't lost much I am obv withdrawing every month but that's not the main issue. I just have no faith in my ability to beat any format any more. Thankfully, I've had the roll to keep withdrawing month in, month out throughout this period
So that's just the poker stuff out the way which actually in the grand scheme of things isn't so bad. For anyone who is mates with me or keeps up to date with my diary, you'll know that one of my daughters (Lily) who has just turned 8 has had a multitude of hurdles since she was born, too many for me to list them all, but she has some physical disabilities along with EDS and has recently been diagnosed with austism too. As of late, the 'symptoms' of which have escalated vvrapidly, she's becoming generally more unhappy, more angry, progressivly more violent/physically aggressive, she's often refusing to eat, refusing to sleep, she is swearing (seemingly involuntarily) at pretty much everyone, me, Emma, the teachers, other kids in her class, her sister Leah (5yr old) who is also becoming really upset by this whole situation. Naturally other parents at school are hearing about this behaviour and 'comments' have been made to the teachers apparently, although they made a point of saying they were comments and not complaints. The teachers are struggling to cope and hints have already been made (imo) at her being excluded/expelled from the school, which would be awful for Lily because she is SO reliant on routine etc that a whole different school would probably make her lose the plot.
Suffice to say I (and Emma ofc) are stressed beyond belief. We're chasing up all of their relevant agencies etc RE: her mental health but most who have been in similar positions before will know that they are all vvvv slow to get anything done.
I also considered getting a 'proper' job for a bit for some added security etc but having discussed it with Emma, it's just notfeasible given Emma's ongoing condition and the insane level of care Lily needs.
So inbetween all of that, and poker I'm just losing the plot lol!
Not really sure how to end this, cos I'm not really sure where I'm going atm but I really wanted to vent it all. I know this is pretty much not poker related at all, but it felt like a good place to get it out (for me).
Not sure what poker I'll be playing this month, thinking of 'doing a Dohhh' and going back to absolute basics, start at the lowest of the low again (for a bit at least), get some confidence going etc, prove to myself I can actually beat some form of poker, and if I can't beat 4NL then it really is gg!
Comments
Beautiful.
I've only been playing MTTs this past week cos been doing a lot of stuff round the house in the daytime, redecorating etc. so points have slowed down. I'll probably do cash in the mornings for this coming week cos of double points, then for the last week, I can take my pick of SnGs or cash. Still comfortable for Prio.
Did you enjoy Double Guarantee week, Paul? Think the overlay bill was something like £18,000.
It repeats next week, too.
I assume most of those £33 tournies are daily 8-00pm Main Events? If so 158 games is still a small sample in a tournament that averages well over 300 runners.
It's a horrible ROI, but it can definitely be explained as just a quirk of MTT variance. I once had a similar run in £5.75s with much smaller fields. Sooner or later it should/will even out. Good luck.
It will turn.
I was having a couple of day's off over the weekend anyway because it was Emma's birthday, so that was a good chance to have a break from the game which felt much need and I've since spoke to a few of the lads on Skype, mostly Bates and Perc and had some very solid advice.
I just gotta try and remember, I had a decent year on Sky last year and I'm sure I had loads of awful patches throughout the year but it ended up alright in the end, so just gotta keep ploughing on with the volume and know that it'll come good in the end.
Feels a bit disjointed this post but just wrote what came to mind, prob doesn't even make sense but I need bed now.
Just a reminder to take a look in the Prio Board Paul, as there are some changes & additions to the Prio Freerols this month.
The Priority Board is HERE
I won't be posting on the diary throughout this month cos I'm going into 'lockdown', trying my hand at DYMs and putting all my focus into that and volumeeee.
So that's just the poker stuff out the way which actually in the grand scheme of things isn't so bad. For anyone who is mates with me or keeps up to date with my diary, you'll know that one of my daughters (Lily) who has just turned 8 has had a multitude of hurdles since she was born, too many for me to list them all, but she has some physical disabilities along with EDS and has recently been diagnosed with austism too. As of late, the 'symptoms' of which have escalated vvrapidly, she's becoming generally more unhappy, more angry, progressivly more violent/physically aggressive, she's often refusing to eat, refusing to sleep, she is swearing (seemingly involuntarily) at pretty much everyone, me, Emma, the teachers, other kids in her class, her sister Leah (5yr old) who is also becoming really upset by this whole situation. Naturally other parents at school are hearing about this behaviour and 'comments' have been made to the teachers apparently, although they made a point of saying they were comments and not complaints. The teachers are struggling to cope and hints have already been made (imo) at her being excluded/expelled from the school, which would be awful for Lily because she is SO reliant on routine etc that a whole different school would probably make her lose the plot.
So inbetween all of that, and poker I'm just losing the plot lol!
Not really sure how to end this, cos I'm not really sure where I'm going atm but I really wanted to vent it all. I know this is pretty much not poker related at all, but it felt like a good place to get it out (for me).