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.Poker.p. j.Jenuis.,long road,to Poker Redemption.

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  • madprofmadprof Member Posts: 3,296
    mumsie said:

    Poker Quiz for @MisterPJ

    love it! filled it in as best I could.....
  • misterpjmisterpj Member Posts: 3,204
    * disclaimer * for the Guvnor

    Because, unfortunately,it tends to be, the case,of fill in the blanks,for a small minority,I will, spell it out, for the few.

    The Guvnor,is T.K. ,Tony Kendall,

    And, if, there is, a blockbuster Poker best seller, I will ( would ) be the first,in line," begging" for a signed,first edition copy,for which, I would gladly, happily, remunerate,top $ , that means, top Moulah-Benji dollar,defacto,hence, respectfully,is why, I (affectionately) christened Matt, with that.

    As this, is a Poker Forum,

    A little bit, of food for thought,( aimed at,you few, usual suspects )

    l, would surmise,that both ,the Guvnor, and SkyPoker, would love it, if every single registered player,was part of a vibrant, ' buzzing Poker Forum'

    Opportunities, occur,out of left field, as in, current world events.

    Wether,a, the ,mini boom,is sustained ? Who knows,but ,with the way, the Globe is,it might be a sustained boom.

    So, " you few " little,gaggle, the forum, is not exclusively yours,have you,any idea? "
    Your pathetic diatribe, yes yours, puts a huge number, SkyPoker registered players,off participation, much more so, than anything,I have ever written.FACT.

    And, I know that,for a fact, how I know that,to be true,is neither here,nor there.

    So, on the basis,I don't get banned,lets address, a few, issues.

    First of all, whatever,difference of opinion, whatever general ,and or, Poker, intellectual Joust, yep, that's right, I dont know how to spell it! Men in Armour, horseback, " jousting" ;

    Whatever, jousting, Mr Bates,and I have had, ( Matt, zero ground bait) please, do not reply,
    simply believe,

    Matt Bates, ( Moulah-Benji) get it ? is about to go, 300,000 K positive , SkyPoker alone.

    A few facts,for the chumps,the few,usual suspects,four of which
    (only four ,not all, could not resist, putting their Oar In) thinking in, on this thread,already.

    Forget that, probably ? Jealous of Matt, being 300,000 K good.
    Google is your friend, SkyPoker , t.v. T.K Matt Bates, all the way back,live T.V. like, a baker's dozen years,a decade ago, etc,etc, even " You Chumps" try here, Tony K , Matt Bates,in the well,

    Why, the few, ( I will say it,Tony, you cant) Matt, plays, Poker, different , are you listening ? South coast ? You Poker I.Q. less numpty, that is, the Guru,the Guvnor,of this site , stating that,multiple times , on Television,and, In The Well..right here mate.

    Read a Book, πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ˜πŸ˜πŸ˜

    Follow the crowd,..like a Poker Sheeple.You ( south coast ) can't,wont,dont want to get it.

    I am not,any sort,of spokesperson," perish the thought " for T.K. Matt Bates,last in the cue,

    Matt's approachable, maybe not in my case,but,if he and I ,do ever meet, I wager my life, ( and you few Poker Langustine) wager my life,that includes madprof , " what a weapon" ? That, intellectual, just ten minutes,would, solve,resolve,All.

    The , best,the very best Poker players,impossible to read.

    P.s. Nostri, madprof,and sorry mate,South Coast FogHorn ?
    If you don't,cant,wont,understand, Poker I.Q., sharky, visualisation technique,et al, maybe?
    Poker not for you?

    Who? Is getting coached ?

    You mate,not me,I would,will,could,gladly DIE. for Poker, you,wouldnt,yet,FogHorn

    Your getting coached,coach,deserves a medal

    Two things, ( three)

    Maybe,your coach,will have, a quite word,in your shell like { Fill in the gaps,Bermondsey Twang,born there,proud,for Ears}

    Maybe,? Matt T.K.so so approachable,in your case,ask, how, player,ImDaNutz, " taught Matt"
    That, is not , in any Book

    You, don't follow the crowd,yiu go Lateral.

    The, erm, awful,( you lot gonna tell him ? privately ? ) Attempt , at down playing Sharky,,dear,dear,.

    Mumsie, no idea ? Why your interest ? Cut me,my blood, runs Aces Royale Spades.

    I am, 54,55 Oct,..zero else. To worry about,..

    One last time,..

    Am ? I allowed,...to play,..on another site ?
    As well ? ,
    And you ..sharky hidden Prof..the Poker Loud Hailer ( Klaxon) with Sharky, hidden .

    I am not,vindictive,my other Poker Account...is all the evidence, I need,to know. 10k a breeze,here,next two years, fully transparent..unlike You.

    Player, ironpump1 did it,with Β£50....fact.

    Me, no chance,not with same " roll" add, a comma,three zero's , I will make, 20 percent, o the bridle..just wanted, huge odds,offered,accepted,laid..

    ImDaNutz..not me. ( Yes, Rozzer, I know, ask Matt)

    Xxx.

    As, Arnie said,....back," I'll Be"

    and, craic on.♍️ X





  • misterpjmisterpj Member Posts: 3,204
    In, like Flynn

    A real word, STALLk. Err..

    If, the above , actually believes, three Bet Isuldar " style raises, " would, faze me, r.o.f.l

    Me. Mate, transparent, public,

    ? Bout You ? Talk the talk

    I too,cant wait..Be Seated..bring it ON, not hard to find .chumpβš οΈπŸ”œβš›οΈ
  • NOSTRINOSTRI Member Posts: 1,459
    misterpj said:

    Who? Is getting coached ?

    You mate,not me,I would,will,could,gladly DIE. for Poker, you,wouldnt,yet,FogHorn

    Your getting coached,coach,deserves a medal

    I agree. He's helped me go from better at poker than you to much better at poker than you.
  • misterpjmisterpj Member Posts: 3,204
    Mr NOSTRI
    Mr mumsie

    I, am not,in anyway,digging out the Coach,who.

    Actually , deserves a Medal

    South Coast , Poker, embarrassed " herself" twice.

    1 sharky
    2 .uksop

    If, I could have committed, nearly did , it would have been, full commitment

    But, with. Real World, present Global situation,

    I could not " comit" because, if,when, family , friends,those few, nearest dearest,..that need
    (You), in times,of need,and,or,mentally strong, reassurence, that everything will be allright,

    On occassion, unfortunate, Poker,has too come, second.

    Xxx
  • mumsiemumsie Member Posts: 7,268
    Poker Quiz for @MisterPJ
  • NOSTRINOSTRI Member Posts: 1,459
    misterpj said:

    If, I could have committed, nearly did , it would have been, full commitment

    But, with. Real World, present Global situation,

    I could not " comit" because, if,when, family , friends,those few, nearest dearest,..that need
    (You), in times,of need,and,or,mentally strong, reassurence, that everything will be allright,

    On occassion, unfortunate, Poker,has too come, second.

    Xxx

    And yet here you are, spilling your over-punctuated word soup all over this forum in the exact moments the challenge is taking place.
  • madprofmadprof Member Posts: 3,296
    Paul..can I ask you a genuine question?

    Why didn't you take up the (charity) offer to join us all in the mini ukops challenge; its a bit of fun, get a random team selection etc

    Ignore all the 'noise'..this was a great opportunity(missed) for you to take part in something and we could all enjoy assessing each other's play

    Seriously..why didn't you? ( you played 1 or 2?)
  • misterpjmisterpj Member Posts: 3,204
    Farcical .

    Intellect , based on, Grammerly.

    I.Q entry level, Intelligence Quotient ( for the usual few Transparent Suspects )

    In life, and ( base entry level Poker )

    In Plain Site..

    Life, lesson first, ( Poker , be like , Shelling Pea's.)

    Spewing, all over the Forum..really, ..

    Chunks, of rake ,paid
    Forum banned .? No.
    Some utter idiot, Cant, won't, diminish to their level, made the claim..Pathetic,in plain Site.

    Paid,chunk of rake, spewing..erm, No.
    " Leave him, alone,on the naughty Poker step, to embarrass himself,chundering away"

    They can't,wont,dont want,to keep it, Poker...

    I will, I can, I will.

    Heated Poker,debate...specific..

    Usual, handful, plain site desperado suspects,dont want that.

    I, wonder, why?πŸ§πŸ”‘xxx

  • madprofmadprof Member Posts: 3,296
    Was that reply to me or Nozzer...??

    I was being sincere when I asked...you could have said:

    didn't fancy it, too busy, not interested ( add any or delete as appropriate)

    You don't have to answer it, prefer not to say would suffice..
    gl tonight
  • misterpjmisterpj Member Posts: 3,204
    Whilst , Mr prof. You are..stall king away. ;

    I am. Enjoying, the pleasure , of Uksop's, which, to my delightful surprise;

    Find. Myself, playing, with bbmike, a player, that has ,my utmost , full Respect.

    Not only that ,I find out , bbmike , lives,not only around the corner, literally....but. On the doorstep. Of my Education..circa 1977..

    Will, gladly. If he accepts.., when this, Over ( global. Not Poker) will offer mikebb , lunch, drinks,,conviviality..I know what it means, u Toby, even if, I can't spell it.

    Your pipe..and. ignite

    πŸ“’πŸ“£πŸ“― Two fogHorns.. appropriate..and a French...is it, a Kiss, or a Letter?.

    The green Gilled Prof..er..

    Wants to be, chrisdonkb (:real class ) Matt Bates ( legend) essexphil ( commands,respect,without trying) .young bucks....brilliant players..ENGY.mynafrett...and, many more .

    You,several, Shades of Jade..🎯
  • madprofmadprof Member Posts: 3,296
    I'm like you Paul...not very good at this game, but I enjoy learning how to get better

    Gl - my last ever entry on your posts-serious or teasing..I really can't be ar sed
  • misterpjmisterpj Member Posts: 3,204
    Lifelong fan , of classic , English sitcoms

    Obscure,and obvious ;

    Erik Sykes ..Paul Eddington The Nineteenth Hole ..
    Robin's Nest..( fancied actress Tessa...double rotten )
    Waiting For God ( supreme)
    To The Manor Born ( Penelope Keith)
    The Good Life ( win double, Margo,Barbara, yum yum) Tom and Jerry, so clever.
    Rising Damp ( Rigsby.Leonard Dossier, inc Rip Richard Beckensdale) and,
    Obviously, Porridge
    Obviously, Fawlty Towers ( only, 13 , ever classic episodes, ) funnily enough, the opening gambit,always based, on, anagrams..Flowery Tw ts.

    Who am I thinking of? Basil the Rat.? Fillegree.Siberian.Hamster.
    Mr Mackay? Prison ( jobs worth) Officer

    But, that, is just not, saying it..What does?

    I know, inspired;

    Got to be, Dad's Army, has to be, Clive Dunn;
    That, would be, Corporal Jones,dont panic,dont panic, Captain Mannering.

    They don't like,the cold steel,Captain Mannering,
    They, don't like it, Up em,Sir.πŸ˜‚

    Do they,usual fewπŸ˜†

    Goodnite.xxx
  • goldongoldon Member Posts: 8,425
    Blimey ....... saving Private Ryan & deciphering the Dead Sea Scrolls easier. gl pj
  • misterpjmisterpj Member Posts: 3,204
    This, is for every single, new and aspirational SkyPoker tournament player.

    Welcome ,good luck.

    Do not be " shy " , or intimidated, 99.9 percent of all players here,are jolly good eggs,the big boss man,he is legend,and your continued Poker advisor,but he is a very busy chap,and as with all things in life, you will encounter one or two circus acts, but fear not.

    I am referencing, six handed,m.t.t.s,from Β£1.10 to Β£11.00

    Take on board,the following, and it will serve you very well.

    1. Poker is meant, to be " fun" as well as serious,but if you are passionate about Poker, there should be a tingle of excitement, every single time, you sit down, to play a tournament,session.
    2. Soak up Poker knowledge,like a sponge,and frame, your own game,with a lateral strategy,as one of the very best players,on planet earth says,every single act,action,in every single hand,that YOU play,conveys information,think about that ( now) for here,at the level suggested,so,I strongly recommend,every hand,every tournament,you make your decision,at the exact same time.
    Why ? Playing that way,you will never, ever,give a timing tell (ever) latter stages of tournaments,with flopped monster hands, you might, wish to give perceived tells, like the Q.C.B. quick check back,also, by using pretty much, all of your time bank,that is your thought process time,to satisfy yourself,that,on this,with this hand,I am making, the correct optimum decision.
    Good,now,while you are playing this way,most of the time,you are ahead of the Poker Curve, the other five players,at your table,are going to convey " free information to you " use it,soak it up, take notes,for the moment,and the future.
    3.the Fold button, is your Poker " best mate" , only open your hand ( six handed) with a specific set of only 33 possible starting hand combinations,we are folding,all the rest,and as that is 33, out of a possible 1326,we are going to be playing,t.a.g. Poker, a very tight but very aggressive strategy.
    I will list, the exact starting hands,we will be playing,( in position) we will never be flat calling,to see a flop, we will be raising,Every Single Time.
    The 33 hands to play,every pocket pair,
    dueces. 2.2. to A.A. that's 13
    The.S. stands for suited, AKs AQs AJs A 10s KQs KJs K 10s QJs Q 10 s J 10s
    10 9 s 9 8 s 8 7 s . That's another 13 , so 26 of our 33 starting hands thus far,so just 7 more.

    Which are, and the o, stands for off suit.

    AK o AQ o AJ o A 10 o K Q o K J o K 10 o

    And, there you have it, I gaurentee,that will put you, ahead of the eight ball, at suggested level.
    ' You' , are going to be,impossible to read, never playing junk , and in the time it has taken,you to read this,...the sky Poker world , will know your possible 33 start card combinations,but they will not know,what to put you on.

    This, has not come from any " book" winged it, while laying in bed, wondering if the very odd plane,I see landing at Gatwick? Is packed,did you see the news? AirLingus,disgusting.
    Neither has this, come from any book, forget small suited pocket connectors,scrap em, every single time, they will get you,into a world of trouble,who told me that,ages and ages ago ?

    One of my favorite players,sadly passed,friend of the boss,DevilFish.


    Contemplating,the HotTub, or a gasper,Woodbine πŸ˜‹

    4.we are raising,every every single time, and the very minimum we are raising,is THREE times the big blind, " genuine" one of the best, respected,players on here, gave me the best compliment ever,recently, and it was, " your raises are giving me BrainAche" that is, a compliment,back handed, or otherwise.

    5.we, are 100 β„… making a continuation bet,on the Flop, having raised pre, BUT, be, very very very wary, of how, and when, to make, occasional bluff moves, that's an Art form ,impossible to teach,save for, you might consider, playing the board,when a turn,or river A appears.

    6.do not, ever, get your Poker trousers,taken down,with just a single,solitary,pocket pair, that is all it is, ever, wether AA or not, it is just one lousy pair, we are playing for, flopped sets ,flopped two pair,and all the rest, of fantastic Poker hands, for the life of me, cannot remember the players name, so I am plagiarising, " No Set No Bet "

    7.if you,do not know,the Poker Hand rankings,in a nano second, you need to,i.e.four of a kind, what Beats that ? Well, four deuces, 2 2 2 2 gets beat by every other four of a kind,and there are 12 potential them,and a straight flush,and obviously, the hand of Poker Dreams,Royal Flush.

    8. Bankroll, your going to need, 40 buy ins, of your average buy in stake.

    This, is just, a little bit of help, for any new player, looking in, don't worry about, the unfortunate odd circus act, who chimes in, and no doubt will, because ? Well, there will be,a usual suspect,that will probably call me out, for not discussing ,expanding on a tactic,known as floating the Flop,etc,

    I ( obviously ) zero affiliation to ' sharky' scope..handy to have,for many reasons, hypothetically,lets say,your hellbent,on becoming brilliant, you even get a top coach, you might wish, to have a real time Poker Barometer, to measure,and detail your Poker Improvement.

    The only equity, I am interested in, is what I have, when the chunks,are in the Pot,because, if I am equity best, I am making the correct, decisions ,bar None,who said that ?

    Mr Phil Helmuth & Mr Doyle Brunson


  • misterpjmisterpj Member Posts: 3,204
    Just a quicky,

    Back to my original, clearly stated intention .

    If I tuck myself, away, in a dusty little corner, of the Forum,bothering absolutely no one,I can, chunder away,to my heart's content, on the Poker naughty step.

    Better than that, last time stating the obvious, ( coach,please explain " him" ) not me.

    What you then do, is reset ,your stats,...for, Focus, and more so, transparent factual accuracy, zero hidden , on a level playing field.

    More so, you then use the visualisation technique,of your stated aim, and what,if anything,you wish to achieve.* on a level playing field, realistic time scale * I.e. Two Years.

    Then, if anyone wants to ' come along, for the Poker ride ' more than welcome,and if not , what the problem.Last time, very last time, Β£10,000 in two years.plus,a fess up , it irks me,not seeing, an 80 rating, next to my name,it was once,feels eons.ago.

    As,simple,as that,three days in, approx 35 Matt.s., and a nifty down,and rated 50.

    Did not play all daytime,yesterday,Poker is, a funny Mistress,played a Β£5.50 b.h approx 08.00 a.m , and UKsop one touney.evening.

    Same hand," done me " twice, my pocket 10 10

    Morning hand, for 6000 K two Bounties, 10 10 , 9 9 , A 2 off, 9 9 9 flopped set,took it down .

    Evening,was 30th of 750, at the time,three Bounties taken,playing with real nice peeps, Inc bbmike,me not in the hand,but his pocket JJ could not hold,against the ace chase.

    Nice player,on my left,throughout,who final tabled,well played,assisted,by, taking my trousers down,when heads up, my 10 10 ran into QQ. That's Poker.

    Still. Honest,genuine,I have not hit,a single big pot ,key spot,when I have been behind,yet.😎
  • mumsiemumsie Member Posts: 7,268
    Just a quicky,

    Back to my original, clearly stated intention


    Don't ever do your posts the injustice of calling them clear.







  • misterpjmisterpj Member Posts: 3,204
    My dear Poker Genuis

    Fess up, you actually want, the pokerJenuis,to coach you.not a chance.

    Now, if my two posts,of this morning,are not, articulate enough , for your good self,it can't be, " hair covering your mince pies,cant it , you self announced,your recent " shearing, last week" .

    Need a trip to spec- savers , myself,when available, maybe,you could,should join me ?

    Now, do run along, if, you want to improve your Poker,just keep observing,watch this space.

    Have a Poker supreme day,that beach must look, supreme,with impending weather,I ponder,to myself,is going for an invigorating " dip" ? Legal,responsible,sensible ?
    As part of allowed,mental and physical exercise,once a day.

    Aces Up, my legion.

    .p.J.enius xxx
  • goldongoldon Member Posts: 8,425
    mumsie said:

    Just a quicky,

    Back to my original, clearly stated intention


    Don't ever do your posts the injustice of calling them clear.


    Nothing wrong with his last two posts........... even I could read them.

    The Da Vinci Code cracked. took Dan Brown. cough!








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