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Sunday Night SHOWWWWWWWWWWwwwww Thread

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  • MachkaMachka Member Posts: 4,627
    edited April 2011
    Stupid sayings, "If you swallow that chewing gum it will wrap itself round your tonsils."

    or

    "If you swallow that chewing gum it will stay in your stomach for 7 years."

    ...because Wrigelys would still be in business if that were true!
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  • MMegabyteMMegabyte Member Posts: 334
    edited April 2011
    In Response to Re: Sunday Night SHOWWWWWWWWWWwwwww Thread:
    At the Check-in Desk at the Airport. "Have you any prohibited items in your luggage?"
    Posted by Tikay10

    Yes, along with, "Did you pack your bags yourself?"

    I have a book which suggests replying, "No, a nice man called Ahmed did it for me"*.

    *Try at own risk
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  • SpikeladSpikelad Member Posts: 406
    edited April 2011
    Hi Rich and Tikay

    Dumb sayings one that always amazes me is when you mention you are going to someones funeral you say i am going to John Smith's funeral on Tuesday and invariably the reply will be oh did he die.

    As far as i am aware there is a law against burying people alive in this country.

    Poker sayings any player moaning that no one gets bad beats like they do,all players get them they just dont moan about them.
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  • Tikay10Tikay10 Member, Administrator, Moderator Posts: 174,187
    edited April 2011

    "This won't hurt".

    Always means EXACTLY the opposite!
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  • Tikay10Tikay10 Member, Administrator, Moderator Posts: 174,187
    edited April 2011

    "The next time you Raise my BB, I'm shoving all-in".

    Yeah, right mate.

    After Raising someone, the geezer dwells for an age then says "I have a hand". Well call me then!
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  • Tikay10Tikay10 Member, Administrator, Moderator Posts: 174,187
    edited April 2011

    The flop comes down 9-9-9,. & then about 8 players all shout in unison,

    "Call the police!"

    Oh how we all laugh.
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  • RICHORFORDRICHORFORD Member Posts: 5,571
    edited April 2011
    If a great aunt dies at a very old age- everyone always says "They had a good innings"

    No, they didn't. They'd never picked up a cricket bat in their life.

    If I'd sent them out to bat against Shane Warne let's face it, they would have struggled.

    How many runs did my great aunt score in her life? Zero.

    So- 'a good life, but a terrible innings' would be more accurate.

    Let's call it as we see it, people.
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  • Tikay10Tikay10 Member, Administrator, Moderator Posts: 174,187
    edited April 2011

    I'm getting wound up here just thinking about these.

    I may even have to inflict some pain on myself.

    ONE TIME

    gyd4p6-[cn
    s'f#v
    #
    hb?L/p]i
    j0u8-9rtyer34kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkktosspot;gc';j,;',cj.inyereyesonbjh[.lkh;.;.jh,.h,h',np[lhkxokhxokhmxmxxsaythatagain&youaresodeaddfxv;ugklv[pjpjjfpk,gdavinagyb.v,;,m,v',jvrichardbransonisadftdrhhxxhx
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  • SoLackSoLack Member Posts: 2,737
    edited April 2011
    Poker expression "sorry"

    Fffffffffsonot or you wd nt make such a stopidcall
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  • SoLackSoLack Member Posts: 2,737
    edited April 2011
    "I only called cos I thought you were bluffing"  grrrrrrrrrr
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  • RICHORFORDRICHORFORD Member Posts: 5,571
    edited April 2011
    When someone's lost something and then eventually find it, they say 'Tsk, it's always in the last place you look, isn't it?'

    Yes, of course it is. You're not going to carry on looking afterwards, are you?

    Sigh...
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  • ybyb Member Posts: 1,471
    edited April 2011
    358370835

    bit of a brag post lol, but also I'd like to see what he's raising the flop with.
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  • lozgolozgo Member Posts: 1,124
    edited April 2011
    macdonalds staff say...have a nice day. when they really mean...go do something anatomically improbable.
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  • loonytoonsloonytoons Member Posts: 4,270
    edited April 2011
    Stupid live poker saying - do you want me to call?
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  • lozgolozgo Member Posts: 1,124
    edited April 2011
    rooney is such a god. no he isn't. he's a short ugly bloke who kicks a ball
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  • lozgolozgo Member Posts: 1,124
    edited April 2011
    when someone says 'you just have to laugh' when you get a bad beat. no i don't. i can scream, shout and throw my toys out of my pram.
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  • debdobs_67debdobs_67 Member Posts: 3,615
    edited April 2011
    When someone says to you 'Im not being nasty BUT................'

    And then you just know they are gonna say something nasty
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  • MMegabyteMMegabyte Member Posts: 334
    edited April 2011
    Disastermind is a FIX?!
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  • delaney09delaney09 Member Posts: 1,145
    edited April 2011
    when someone rings you on your house phone and asks where are you........... where do you think i am do you tnink my house phone goes around the streets with me
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  • MMegabyteMMegabyte Member Posts: 334
    edited April 2011
    I think we need to run a sweepstake on what time during this show violence is going to break out.
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