dont let it get you down Ry its brutal atm i,m going thru similar ive just reduced my tables and BIs gonna ride it out like you said play for fun you can still get some good scores playing the fiver games and they won,t hurt your BR as much chill and ride it out gl friend
I think I just need a break. There are a lot more important things going in the world right now so I really shouldn't be moaning over a game of poker, sorry about that.
I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend with the family, not that we can do much, and just forget about poker for a few days.
I see you've played about 500 mtt's since your big score and lost around £400 according to scope. Don't be too hard on yourself. That's about 2 weeks worth of grinding for MattBates and even he will have plenty of 2 week periods where he loses. It feels worse because it's been near 2 1/2 months for you. Poker isn't fun when you have sticky patches, but if you keep faith in your game (and you should, especially when you have Melt in your corner) you WILL start winning again. It's just about taking the pain when it's not going well. It isn't a game that rewards you in the short term, at least not always.
That being said, if your really not enjoying it it's okay to take time off. Poker will always be there to be picked up whenever you're ready to play again. Maybe capping your buy ins to £11 tournaments could help mentally. You don't get the pain of the near misses for big amounts of money and your win rate should be much bigger, so your results are more likely to pick up again.
BTW spinning a £100 roll to £4000 is a great accomplishment and is something you should take pride in. You'll reach £10k eventually if your sensible, it just might take longer than you'd like.
Yeah, what Paul Grogba said.
I plugged that sample of games into a variance calculator with your ABI of 9.4 and gave you a tasty ROI of 30%
Standard deviation from the mean outcome is over £1000 which just goes to show the variety of possible outcomes expected over those 500 games. If you look at the bottom confidence interval the expected outcome is projected as somewhere between -29% ROI and 105% ROI, which is a friggin enormous difference.
One thing worth noting is that this assumes you played 500 £9.40 MTTs which obviously you didn't and the real variance is going to be wayyyyy greater as you're playing a large range of buy-ins. How you run at the top of your ABI has a drastic effect on your overall result, even if you run above EV at the lower stakes during that sample.
Just as another example, if we drop your estimated ROI to 20% (I'm pulling the numbers for your 'true' winrate out of my 4rse obviously!) you can see the variance further increases and you're supposed to lose around 20% of the time. Like I say this is assuming identical buy-ins and field sizes for every game so real variance will be way higher.
TL;DR - lolaments swongs
Also, like Groggle and @stokefc said, dropping your ABI could be an option. £5.50 games get more up top than £22s had a few weeks ago!
FWIW I quite like the raw ranty post-session write-ups
A break is definitely in order though as there were a couple of games last night where quite frankly I was terrible. Basically making stupid plays and calls out of desperation. That alone is a sign to step away from the tables, take a bit of time off and come back refreshed.
I think I just need a break. There are a lot more important things going in the world right now so I really shouldn't be moaning over a game of poker, sorry about that.
I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend with the family, not that we can do much, and just forget about poker for a few days.
I've been giving it some thought now I am a lot calmer. I didnt really miss not playing last night and I feel like playing tonight but mainly out of boredom so I will pass. By tomorrow night I reckon there is a good chance that I will really be up for a game.
With that in mind, if I do end up playing I will be sticking with the original plan of treating myself to a shot at the 50k Main. I know the best route would be via satellites, but then there is the chance of not winning a seat and I end up buying in anyway. So if I do play then I am just buying in and getting back to just having fun again.
I'm not going crazy and spewing off my bankroll though. If it all ends badly then I am going to follow the advice and significantly drop my table count and cap my buyins to £11 until I start to see an improvement.
Well I dusted myself off and took the punt, and even though it didn't quite go to plan, I actually really enjoyed myself.
I have a new life coach in my missus and what she said to me made a lot of sense. She sees first hand how wound up I get and how much I beat myself up and she has always found it funny, which winds me up even more.
Her words before the session tonight, after I asked her if I should bother having a bit of a punt, were spot on though (minus a few rude words):
"Look Ryan, just calm down. You play for fun, you're playing with money you have already won, so what if you lose a bit. Why do you even play if it stresses you out so much?"......or words to that effect.
She is bang on. I don't play for a living, I never will be playing for a living. This is my hobby and hobbies are supposed to be a laugh.
Anyway.....tonight was close. I bought into every UKOPs and gave it a proper crack. I ended up slightly down and have dipped below the 4K, which after the pep talk doesn't even feel that bad.
I min cashed in the 55, but that was due to a nasty river to counterfeit my 77. I win that hand then I'm on for a great score.
I came close in the hyper, finishing well in the money in a tournament that needs a lot of run good in order to win.
I couldn't get going in the big shot in the Main but running AK into KK towards the mid stages is totally standard. So all in all I have to be reasonably happy and the missus is right, calm down and just enjoy playing again!
Finished about £60 down but considering how much I was in for I really can't complain.
So, that's me done for the next 3 nights as there is a drama on TV that I've been waiting to watch. The plan when I come back is to take the advice from previous posts and lower the average buy in, cap myself at £11 buyins for a while, drop the table count and just get back to enjoying the game and let the bankroll take care of itself.
Well I dusted myself off and took the punt, and even though it didn't quite go to plan, I actually really enjoyed myself.
I have a new life coach in my missus and what she said to me made a lot of sense. She sees first hand how wound up I get and how much I beat myself up and she has always found it funny, which winds me up even more.
Her words before the session tonight, after I asked her if I should bother having a bit of a punt, were spot on though (minus a few rude words):
"Look Ryan, just calm down. You play for fun, you're playing with money you have already won, so what if you lose a bit. Why do you even play if it stresses you out so much?"......or words to that effect.
She is bang on. I don't play for a living, I never will be playing for a living. This is my hobby and hobbies are supposed to be a laugh.
Anyway.....tonight was close. I bought into every UKOPs and gave it a proper crack. I ended up slightly down and have dipped below the 4K, which after the pep talk doesn't even feel that bad.
I min cashed in the 55, but that was due to a nasty river to counterfeit my 77. I win that hand then I'm on for a great score.
I came close in the hyper, finishing well in the money in a tournament that needs a lot of run good in order to win.
I couldn't get going in the big shot in the Main but running AK into KK towards the mid stages is totally standard. So all in all I have to be reasonably happy and the missus is right, calm down and just enjoy playing again!
Finished about £60 down but considering how much I was in for I really can't complain.
So, that's me done for the next 3 nights as there is a drama on TV that I've been waiting to watch. The plan when I come back is to take the advice from previous posts and lower the average buy in, cap myself at £11 buyins for a while, drop the table count and just get back to enjoying the game and let the bankroll take care of itself.
Stay safe all.
Start BR: £100 Current: £3993.68
First hand!
Even I don’t get wound up that often after the first hand
Time for the weekly update, which in reality is just the one session last night as I felt a bit of a break was in order.
The plan was to cap myself at £11 buyins but I found myself sacking that off an hour or so into the session. I did drop the average buyin though by not playing a few of the 22s that would normally be in the schedule.
However, I found the Friday Main and the Megastack BH too tempting to ignore. It proved to be a wise decision as it was these two tournaments that really saved the night.
The Main was looking winnable, I had a top 6 stack when the bubble burst and I kept the momentum going as we got down to the final 4 tables. It wasn't to be though, my luck ran out and I exited in 19th place, with mixed emotions and a little profit.
The Megastack BH was a different affair. I was never really in that one and was just hanging on approaching the money. After the bubble burst my luck changed for the better, the exact opposite of the situation in the Main event. @jac35 very kindly doubled me up (twice I think) and I was bang in it approaching the final table. But I thought it was only fair that I gave the chips back to Paul and depart in 7th.
A half decent evening at least. I'm disappointed with the way the Main ended but sometimes there is nothing you can do.
Finished the night +£120ish which is the first winning session in quite some time.
Night off tonight, Saturday is always film and takeaway night with the family, but back on the tables tomorrow.
Yeah you're definitely right there and I have offered to withdraw some numerous times. She's a good lass though, if I do ever hit the 10k, or even end up not getting there and cutting my losses, then she will be first on the treat list.
I know full well I have a made a few really bad mistakes this last week, normally right at the crucial time, but also in other games things just have not been going my way at all.
I don't really want to over analyse things and I'm trying not to beat myself up. I have to be honest though as it has now been a sustained period of playing with a higher average buyin and I'm losing. It's there in black and white.
The toughest games for me are the £22s, I get beaten up in those the most so the time has come to re-evaluate and alter the schedule. I'm dropping those for now and I'm going to start playing some more £2.20 deepstacks. I'm sticking with the £33 mains though, certainly until the bankroll drops to below £3.5k then I'll look at the schedule again.
First major blip since I started the diary now, doubting myself bigtime, but not giving up just yet.
Mini UKOPS can't come soon enough.
Stay safe all.
Start BR: £100 Current: £3882.87....at least I'm below £4k now so that psychological barrier can do one, every cloud and all that.....
Comments
If you need the break, take it. Come back refreshed. Rumour has it there may be a MINI UKOPS coming soon (but dont tell anyone I told you that)
Head up mate...stay strong...stay safe...and stay off my tables when you come back, please.
like you said play for fun you can still get some good scores playing the fiver games and they won,t hurt your BR as much
chill and ride it out
gl friend
I think I just need a break. There are a lot more important things going in the world right now so I really shouldn't be moaning over a game of poker, sorry about that.
I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend with the family, not that we can do much, and just forget about poker for a few days.
Stay safe all and try to have a good weekend.
Moan over, apologies.
I plugged that sample of games into a variance calculator with your ABI of 9.4 and gave you a tasty ROI of 30%
Standard deviation from the mean outcome is over £1000 which just goes to show the variety of possible outcomes expected over those 500 games. If you look at the bottom confidence interval the expected outcome is projected as somewhere between -29% ROI and 105% ROI, which is a friggin enormous difference.
One thing worth noting is that this assumes you played 500 £9.40 MTTs which obviously you didn't and the real variance is going to be wayyyyy greater as you're playing a large range of buy-ins. How you run at the top of your ABI has a drastic effect on your overall result, even if you run above EV at the lower stakes during that sample.
Just as another example, if we drop your estimated ROI to 20% (I'm pulling the numbers for your 'true' winrate out of my 4rse obviously!) you can see the variance further increases and you're supposed to lose around 20% of the time. Like I say this is assuming identical buy-ins and field sizes for every game so real variance will be way higher.
TL;DR - lolaments swongs
Also, like Groggle and @stokefc said, dropping your ABI could be an option. £5.50 games get more up top than £22s had a few weeks ago!
FWIW I quite like the raw ranty post-session write-ups
"FWIW I quite like the raw ranty post-session write-ups"
Same here, totally honest stuff. And not even close to @Jac35 in the moaning stakes.
I do need to improve my mental game, a lot.
A break is definitely in order though as there were a couple of games last night where quite frankly I was terrible. Basically making stupid plays and calls out of desperation. That alone is a sign to step away from the tables, take a bit of time off and come back refreshed.
I’m having to really up my game regarding moaning currently to stay at the top
With that in mind, if I do end up playing I will be sticking with the original plan of treating myself to a shot at the 50k Main. I know the best route would be via satellites, but then there is the chance of not winning a seat and I end up buying in anyway. So if I do play then I am just buying in and getting back to just having fun again.
I'm not going crazy and spewing off my bankroll though. If it all ends badly then I am going to follow the advice and significantly drop my table count and cap my buyins to £11 until I start to see an improvement.
Hope everybody has as good a weekend as possible.
I have a new life coach in my missus and what she said to me made a lot of sense. She sees first hand how wound up I get and how much I beat myself up and she has always found it funny, which winds me up even more.
Her words before the session tonight, after I asked her if I should bother having a bit of a punt, were spot on though (minus a few rude words):
"Look Ryan, just calm down. You play for fun, you're playing with money you have already won, so what if you lose a bit. Why do you even play if it stresses you out so much?"......or words to that effect.
She is bang on. I don't play for a living, I never will be playing for a living. This is my hobby and hobbies are supposed to be a laugh.
Anyway.....tonight was close. I bought into every UKOPs and gave it a proper crack. I ended up slightly down and have dipped below the 4K, which after the pep talk doesn't even feel that bad.
I min cashed in the 55, but that was due to a nasty river to counterfeit my 77. I win that hand then I'm on for a great score.
I came close in the hyper, finishing well in the money in a tournament that needs a lot of run good in order to win.
I couldn't get going in the big shot in the Main but running AK into KK towards the mid stages is totally standard. So all in all I have to be reasonably happy and the missus is right, calm down and just enjoy playing again!
Finished about £60 down but considering how much I was in for I really can't complain.
So, that's me done for the next 3 nights as there is a drama on TV that I've been waiting to watch. The plan when I come back is to take the advice from previous posts and lower the average buy in, cap myself at £11 buyins for a while, drop the table count and just get back to enjoying the game and let the bankroll take care of itself.
Stay safe all.
Start BR: £100
Current: £3993.68
Lovely post Ryan.
Even I don’t get wound up that often after the first hand
You’ve overtaken me 😉
I'm booking that as a winning session.....
Start BR: £100
Current: £4001
oioi, we are back above £4,000, & all's well.
The plan was to cap myself at £11 buyins but I found myself sacking that off an hour or so into the session. I did drop the average buyin though by not playing a few of the 22s that would normally be in the schedule.
However, I found the Friday Main and the Megastack BH too tempting to ignore. It proved to be a wise decision as it was these two tournaments that really saved the night.
The Main was looking winnable, I had a top 6 stack when the bubble burst and I kept the momentum going as we got down to the final 4 tables. It wasn't to be though, my luck ran out and I exited in 19th place, with mixed emotions and a little profit.
The Megastack BH was a different affair. I was never really in that one and was just hanging on approaching the money. After the bubble burst my luck changed for the better, the exact opposite of the situation in the Main event. @jac35 very kindly doubled me up (twice I think) and I was bang in it approaching the final table. But I thought it was only fair that I gave the chips back to Paul and depart in 7th.
A half decent evening at least. I'm disappointed with the way the Main ended but sometimes there is nothing you can do.
Finished the night +£120ish which is the first winning session in quite some time.
Night off tonight, Saturday is always film and takeaway night with the family, but back on the tables tomorrow.
Start BR: £100
Current: £4127.54
Stay safe everybody.
Yeah you're definitely right there and I have offered to withdraw some numerous times. She's a good lass though, if I do ever hit the 10k, or even end up not getting there and cutting my losses, then she will be first on the treat list.
I know full well I have a made a few really bad mistakes this last week, normally right at the crucial time, but also in other games things just have not been going my way at all.
I don't really want to over analyse things and I'm trying not to beat myself up. I have to be honest though as it has now been a sustained period of playing with a higher average buyin and I'm losing. It's there in black and white.
The toughest games for me are the £22s, I get beaten up in those the most so the time has come to re-evaluate and alter the schedule. I'm dropping those for now and I'm going to start playing some more £2.20 deepstacks. I'm sticking with the £33 mains though, certainly until the bankroll drops to below £3.5k then I'll look at the schedule again.
First major blip since I started the diary now, doubting myself bigtime, but not giving up just yet.
Mini UKOPS can't come soon enough.
Stay safe all.
Start BR: £100
Current: £3882.87....at least I'm below £4k now so that psychological barrier can do one, every cloud and all that.....
@waller02
"First major blip since I started the diary"
It's only a major blip in your mind Ryan.
It's almost certainly just variance having some sport with you.